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Thread: Confession Session

  1. #4561
    The Moustache Bandit Nolus's Avatar
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    Apr 2010
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    Default Re: Confession Session

    Thank you all. Your posts helped me in seeing this thing (the make-up etc.) from other perspectives. It made me feel a little more comfortable with it even though I don't plan on trying it in the near future or even using it other than really special occasions. Maybe I'll change someday. I'm sure to be more open from now on. Or try to at least.

    On the second thing (genders). I basically grew up with my mom, who also was like a boy in her teens, so in family, it was always a common and accepted thing that I was more of a tomboy. School was different and I believe that's what made me rethink my way of acting and made me feel insecure. Even now I get comments like "Is he or a boy or a girl?" from random people behind my backs even though I wear relatively girlish clothes and well, my body differs. Heck, even my hair helps others to recognize I'm a damn female. Yet, it's like a custom now, only they aren't that loud (I can hear them though) and they don't shout it into my face. There was a time when it bothered me. Then, I tried to laugh at it like "Morons...". I thought it worked, but now I think it backfired a little: I only repressed my feelings and it slowly began to grow bigger and bigger. Now I hate to ask: "Why do they question my gender? I'm not a little kid anymore, I'm half an adult in body... Why do they still mock me? Why can I hear them all over again?". I really don't understand. My family kind of got used to it, so of course they tell me I'm not that boyish anymore, but are others simply blind to see that?
    They once (my classmates) asked me why I always act/look like a boy. I answered (can't remember what) then they called me a lesbian. I was very offended, even though I have nothing against homosexuality, but that's just calling my someone/something I am not. It didn't help that they were laughing their asses off. I couldn't even go talk to someone, because I was in Paris, and I was way too afraid of going to a teacher because I know it was just a joke on their end.

    I may have gone off the current topic. Sorry for that.

  2. #4562

    Default Re: Confession Session

    It always helps to be aware of the fact that more than half the world consists of immature pricks, and when you're in a high school environment sadly you get exposed to it full-time. I also remembered the idiots in school who would just randomly throw out labels like "gay" and "lesbian" like they could know someone's entire personality from a judgement of their looks. Or like it was for some reason an insult.

    It gets better as you grow into the adult world and people begin to value you more because of who you are and what you do, and the ones who make judgements are the maladjusted ones. As backward and stupid people are, society really has come a long way in terms of that.

    Also, unrelated, but I really wish I could go to Paris ...


    PSN & NNID: Anax4Aero 3DS FC: 1504 - 6058 - 2691


  3. #4563
    Royal Pain~ Chrissie's Avatar
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    May 2009
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    In my own lil' world~

    Default Re: Confession Session

    I only wear make-up when going out reaaally formal. Maybe some mascara or pencil eyeliner at a cafe but that's quite rare. I prefer to show my feminine side with cute shirts and jean skirts (I am a fanatic :P) instead of putting that stuff on my face. :U It feels very weird and uncomfortable when I put make-up on and even when I do, it's always just a couple of drops. :3 If -IF- you want to start wearing make-up, don't go for the heavy stuff. Try out light stuff. I find that a thin line of black pencil eyeliner on the top eye lid, smudged with an eye-shadow of your choice (I personally use blue, green or pink with a shine), to be more than enough and gives you a subtle change of look~

    And don't worry about them people ranting. I have my mom bitching at me for that every time I get ready to go out. "Put on some make-up! Even just a bit of pencil eyeliner!! Get pretty!" and I am just "Meuh. :U" And leave with only brushing my hair.
    Last edited by Chrissie; May 18th, 2012 at 11:02 PM. Reason: PS: I've seen you. You are quite pretty without any make-up. Carry on the natural look girl! 8D
    My 3DS Friend Code: 1091 - 8457 - 8212

    ~Rock and Roll~

  4. #4564

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Uni is finished, i don't have any more classes. It is finally over.
    Now i want to DJ a radio show over movies, unfortunately i got no idea how to start.
    WHAT!!!
    GO AWAY!!

  5. #4565
    Depraved Prince of AP Monkey King's Avatar
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    Apr 2011
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    Southwest Connecticut, US

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Quote Originally Posted by bartholemew kuma View Post
    Uni is finished, i don't have any more classes. It is finally over.
    Now i want to DJ a radio show over movies, unfortunately i got no idea how to start.
    Start a "Barbary Pirate Radio"! ba dum ting

  6. #4566

    Default Re: Confession Session

    From what I've seen, currently most of those efforts now begin with the internets. Start a podcast, get friends to join it and spread the word, and if it's good enough people will start tuning in and expanding your audience and maybe eventually you can carry around enough weight to request air time somewhere and ensure a [insert radio equivalent of viewership].
    Not sure how accurately this depicts the process since it's not a business I've considered following, but it's kind of what I envision for my writing career, to just start doing blogs online, and get some attention that could eventually help attract publishers.

    Also, on that note, if you do start doing that you should share your stuff with us, I'd be interested to hear!


    PSN & NNID: Anax4Aero 3DS FC: 1504 - 6058 - 2691


  7. #4567
    Depraved Prince of AP Monkey King's Avatar
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    Apr 2011
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    Southwest Connecticut, US

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Quote Originally Posted by Noqanky View Post
    From what I've seen, currently most of those efforts now begin with the internets. Start a podcast, get friends to join it and spread the word, and if it's good enough people will start tuning in and expanding your audience and maybe eventually you can carry around enough weight to request air time somewhere and ensure a [insert radio equivalent of viewership].
    Not sure how accurately this depicts the process since it's not a business I've considered following, but it's kind of what I envision for my writing career, to just start doing blogs online, and get some attention that could eventually help attract publishers.

    Also, on that note, if you do start doing that you should share your stuff with us, I'd be interested to hear!
    I'm not really sure that's gonna work so well in Libya and North Africa in general though unless he doesn't care about the local audience (I don't think that's his approach). Internet penetration is pretty low in Libya (no doubt the former police state had something to do with that).
    Going the classic way is probably better for him I'd say. And frankly that's the great ROMANCE of radio, the little show left of the dial that you have to fight the static to hear perfectly, but is worth it.....ahhhh. A dying art in the States to be sure....

  8. #4568
    Royal Pain~ Chrissie's Avatar
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    May 2009
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    In my own lil' world~

    Default Re: Confession Session

    I had a friend who worked as a DJ in a radio station in Greece. There you can get your own show for free but you also have to work it for free. xD In Cyprus is way more complicated. You need to have a degree, you get hired and you get heavily paid xP Aka it's a job~
    My 3DS Friend Code: 1091 - 8457 - 8212

    ~Rock and Roll~

  9. #4569

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Hahaha a podcast aint gonna help my situation. I can get the gig easily since i have pitched the idea and the exec's loved it. I just need to figure out how to fill in 30 minutes of material without sounding boring or too informative. This will start on the 21st of June.
    WHAT!!!
    GO AWAY!!

  10. #4570

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Aah, context ... that thing I severely lacked. My apologies.

    What kind of show is it? You mentioned movies ... is it you doing reviews of movies, or talking of the industry ...?


    PSN & NNID: Anax4Aero 3DS FC: 1504 - 6058 - 2691


  11. #4571

    Default Re: Confession Session

    My passion is movies, i want to talk about really anything. I have downloaded a few movie podcasts from itunes. Hopefully after listening to them i will have an idea of how to run this show.
    I have worked in a music radio show before but the music itself took away 20 minutes of that.
    I'm thinking of having a review of the week, talk about the box office, new films coming out.
    argh, i am not sure

    I should be concentrating on my Pathology Lab final exam tomorrow.
    WHAT!!!
    GO AWAY!!

  12. #4572
    Depraved Prince of AP Monkey King's Avatar
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    Apr 2011
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    Southwest Connecticut, US

    Default Re: Confession Session

    What about the new Sacha Cohen movie? The Dictator?
    Not sure how that would be seen in Libya or by you (some people think it's offenseive to Arabs?...eh). But it's pretty obviously mocking dictators like Gaddafi so there's that.

    When I saw it the other day I'm pretty sure a bunch of Arab dudes were sitting behind me laughing their asses off but they could have been South Asian not sure.

  13. #4573
    Fightoplankton Gliblord's Avatar
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    Mar 2010
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    JET-setting in 上山、山形

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Is it worth watching in theaters?

  14. #4574

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Quote Originally Posted by bartholemew kuma View Post
    My passion is movies, i want to talk about really anything. I have downloaded a few movie podcasts from itunes. Hopefully after listening to them i will have an idea of how to run this show.
    I have worked in a music radio show before but the music itself took away 20 minutes of that.
    I'm thinking of having a review of the week, talk about the box office, new films coming out.
    argh, i am not sure

    I should be concentrating on my Pathology Lab final exam tomorrow.
    Once you narrow things down, it gets considerably easier to plan. I'm teaching spanish courses at a summer school and had to design lesson plans for each day, and when I first started all I knew was that I'd be teaching Spanish and it'd be fun. Once I made an outline of the things I wanted to cover and organized them by day, it got progressively easier to micromanage my time and now I'm at the point where I got almost every minute of every class accounted for.
    On that note, it's easy to start by figuring out how you want to open each show and how you want to close it. Then think of an objective for the content and fill in accordingly. You could even make a template on a word processor to plan each show from now until forever.

    What Zeph suggests is a great idea, of talking about how current movies reflect the socio-political environment we live in. What personally got to me the most about Dictator is that we have characters making 911 jokes in the trailer and people in theaters were laughing, while a couple years ago it may have still been taboo. I'd definitely love to know how people in North African and Middle Eastern countries will perceive the movie.
    On that note, will you have guests in your show? It's probably a pain to arrange but it's usually very enlightening to have a conversation with people who know about different fields and have different perspectives.

    Frankly, I think once you get down to writing each specific show out you'll find out that 30 minutes is actually a very short amount of time to say everything you want to, especially since movies are your passion. From what I recall every time I talk to friends about movies it goes on for hours.
    Best of luck! (on the final too ... )


    PSN & NNID: Anax4Aero 3DS FC: 1504 - 6058 - 2691


  15. #4575
    Depraved Prince of AP Monkey King's Avatar
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    Apr 2011
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    Southwest Connecticut, US

    Default Re: Confession Session

    I'd suggest if possible to find a partner, from listening to radio and even just watching videa game LP's, things are great with back and forth banter. It can even make going off topic fun if you got chemistry with the partner.

  16. #4576
    Fightoplankton Gliblord's Avatar
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    Mar 2010
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    JET-setting in 上山、山形

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Indeed, having a co-host is greater than the sum of its parts, if you've got a great rapport.

  17. #4577
    Heart'n'Skull Nami's Avatar
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    Sep 2010
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    Germany

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Spoiler:


    ...
    I guess I really have a personality disorder. That's not shocking to me.
    For the last 4 to 5 Years I thought I could deal with it, live with it, grow out of it. Be normal. But today I realized... Of course I was able to handle it the last couple of years. Because I had no too close connections. Because I kept myself from anything too serious. I was a loner and it was good. Everything was fine.
    Now that I found someone I turned psycho.
    And you know what's worse? I feel like I've lost. I thought I could handle everything just fine, cope with everything, be normal, live normal and now I have to realize.. that's not how it works. I can't escape myself. I can't run away from me, from my thoughts, from my disorder. I thought I could. I wanted to.
    The mother of my mum commited suicide, my mother tried a few times. So what does that mean for me? I always told myself, I won't end up like this, I'll have an awesome life and evertyhing will be great cuz I will make it great.
    And I can't. I can't escape my "fate". I can't escape it.
    The only possible escape is to let nobody ever close again. To keep everyone at a distance. Because if I don't, I'm not only destroying myself, but them as well. And I don't want that. I don't want to be the reason why someone someday says "This bitch ruined me!". I don't want more people thinking "that time with her was bad and I regret every minute of it, I wish I've never met her in the first place."
    I thought about a therapy, but how to find a good one and someone who has time more than once every three month and how to pay for it? I feel like I've sunken too deep to get any help now. And ... I don't want it. It's one thing to admit to myself, that I'm sick and might need help, but it's something completely different, having to admit it to some stranger who acts like he actually cares, because he gets payed for it. All my past experiences with therapists went.. bad.


    I lost hope.

    Visit me on Facebook: Heart'n'Skull

  18. #4578

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Admitting it is the first step in recovery. Also the hardest part.
    The second is to begin to face it head on.
    WHAT!!!
    GO AWAY!!

  19. #4579
    Heart'n'Skull Nami's Avatar
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    Sep 2010
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    Germany

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Quote Originally Posted by bartholemew kuma View Post
    Admitting it is the first step in recovery. Also the hardest part.
    The second is to begin to face it head on.
    thx, but I already know this. And it's not helping.

    Visit me on Facebook: Heart'n'Skull

  20. #4580

    Default Re: Confession Session

    Right then, i thought being soft and some encouragement could be useful but it seems like it was not..
    Hard Truth time:-

    1. Being a "Loner" is not good, ever, for any situation, take it from a med student who worked with some messed up people during a war. Being physically with people is a powerful thing. Change this.
    2. You are not Psycho. You will need psycho-analysis but i do not think you are psycho.
    3. Escape "fate"??? Really now.... i thought you were better than this. Read it, then re-read it and keep doing so until you see what is "wrong" with that sentence. Fate is an illusion created to act as a defense shield for anybody who is too sad about their life and have given up trying to fix it.
    4. That's the depression and the defense mechanism talking.
    5. The therapy is your own choice.
    WHAT!!!
    GO AWAY!!

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