Last edited by piratemarimo; April 25th, 2011 at 09:37 PM. Reason: Chapter 2: Avoiding the Landlady
'Tis good. Keep writing.
It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog. It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log. But when I get home to you, I find the things that you do will make me feel alright. You know I feel alright, yeah.
I've never played Monopoly so we'd both be playing blind. We could play Battleship.
Originally Posted by trappedolphin
I think Gyps and I should have some lesbian action.
*goes back into creep hole*
[Scene 1 - DURIAN vs. Terazord]
"You've gone too far, Hans von ChesCa!" Iron Ventriloquist shouted. "It's time to show you... the power of D.U.R.I.A.N.!"
As DURIAN moved into position to battle, a flashback occurred. The story of Hans von ChesCa begins...
Chapter 2: Turn Back the Durian: -XIV
[Scene 2 - A random high school, 1986]
A young Hans von ChesCa waltzed merrily through the halls of his High School for no apparent reason other than to contrast his future evil self. Hans loved everything, but what he really loved... was the taste of a durian.
"I've never tasted a durian before," Marimo squeaked quietly as she discussed the mythical fruit with Hans and their friends.
"I hear if you eat a durian, your breath will stink forever," Kylor added as Marimo nodded her head.
"I've eaten plenty of durians on my weekly visits to Southeast Asia," Hero huffed as a young and porky RBoar fanned him with a large array of 100 dollar bills.
"Well, Hans," Kitsune spoke up reassuringly. "Since you care so much, if I ever find a durian, I'll let you have the first bite. That's a promise."
Hans looked up to his high school friend and looked forward to the day when he would taste a durian of his own...
[Scene 3 - Present-Day, inside the Terazord]
"Damn you, Kitsune," Hans growled maliciously as he pondered about his past. "When you received special powers from a durian, you broke a very important promise to me. And for that, you bastard, I sentence you to die!"
Hans huffed and puffed and tried to aim the Terazord at D.U.R.I.A.N., though his efforts were rendered useless when Death by Foxy and Ultra Parrot flew up the Terazord's nasal cavity and into the Terazord.
"We meet again, Hans!" Foxy growled as Ultra Parrot dropped him to the ground.
"The pleasure is mine, Kitsune," Hans replied with jest. "Or should I say Traitor by Foxy? It's been 25 years since we last spoke, you know."
"I thought you were 24?"
"That's beside the point," Hans shouted as he rose to his feet. "You broke a very important promise to me, and now you will suffer for it! Insider, to me."
Insider emerged from the shadows, trying desperately to hide the picture of Claire he had just been covering with his saliva. "Hey, Hans, if I kill these guys, can you make me a Claire bot?"
"Sure," Hans grinned. "Now get to work."
"Leave him to me, Foxy," Ultra Parrot suggested as he charge in wings-a-blazin' after his opponent. "You stop the Terazord!"
"Sounds like a plan!" Foxy shouted as he set fire in excitement.
[Scene 3 - Outside the Terazord]
Iron Ventriloquist, Rose Garden, Avalanche, and Narcissista G tried their hardest to avoid Terazord's attacks, though Avalanche and Rose Garden had already collapsed with fatigue.
"Come on, Foxy," Iron Ventriloquist grumbled. "You guys need to hurry! We can't hold out much longer!"
"Damn, I look good," Narcissista pointed out as she struck a pose.
[Scene 4 - Inside the Terazord]
"Forgive me, my lord," Insider sighed as he collapsed in defeat.
"Offscreen asskicking!" Ultra Parrot shouted as the battle between Hans and Foxy began.
"Give it up, Hans," Foxy barked as Hans narrowly dodged his punch. "You're up against D.U.R.I.A.N. You don't have what it takes to defeat superheroes like us!"
"Oh, my foxy friend," Hans cackled as he began to glow. "You think you're the only one with superpowers?"
"What!?" Ultra Parrot shouted as Hans cackled even louder to the point of coughing.
"No way, you ate a durian, too?" Foxy asked in surprise.
"I have no need for such rotten fruit," Hans explained. "I've created something more than that! I've genetically engineered a fruit that emulates the superpowers granted by the durian. Give it up, D.U.R.I.A.N. My Devil Fruit eclipses your inferior 'durian' powers! Kyahahahahahahaha!"
[Scene 5 - A studio in Japan]
Oda flicked his cigarette into his trash can and lit up another as he phoned his lawyer.
"Yes, is this RBoar?" Oda inquired. "Why, yes, I'd like to file a lawsuit for copyright infringement."
[Scene 6 - Inside the Terazord]
[Cue DARK magical girl transformation sequence #1 - Hans becomes Cuddles the Dark!]
Cuddles growled wickedly as he took on his new form, a giant dark blue panther.
"My name is Cuddles the Dark! You killed my dreams! Prepare to die!"
"Oh my god, I turned him into a furry," Foxy gasped.
[Death by Foxy vs. Cuddles the Dark. Has D.U.R.I.A.N. met its match? Find out on the next D.U.R.I.A.N.: Analog Monsters!]
Now 95% worse than the first chapter!
... so... I AM THE WEAKEST?
Prepare to die, Fox, reason for all evil.
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