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Thread: Confession Session II

  1. #2121
    Discovered Stowaway The D.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by MDL View Post
    It doesn't get much worse than what I did.

    I was VERY into a certain Pokémon IOS app in 2018.
    Me and my friend would sink hours into it every day.

    You know those horror stories you hear about, where people waste lots of money on addictive pay-2-win apps?
    I would definitely qualify for one of those stories. I was frighteningly addicted.
    I spent roughly $4200 on the in-game bonuses and boosts.

    Here's a brief peek at some of my receipts...



    As you can see, April ALONE was $1807...
    I eventually escaped the addiction, but I'll forever be ashamed that I pissed away all that money on some stupid mobile game just because I could.
    I'm glad you were able to get yourself out of that situation. Those things can ruin your life. And it takes a strong person to finally say enough is enough. Good on you.
    Gonna give ya the D.!

  2. #2122
    Discovered Stowaway Lord Gaimon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by The D. View Post
    I bought a nearly three hundred dollar custom lightsaber and now I feel like shit because of it. I get paid in a week and had some extra money so I bought something I've wanted for a while. But I'm feeling incredibly guilty for spending so much money on something so stupid and frivolous.
    should've donated that money to kids in africa

  3. #2123
    Discovered Stowaway The D.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Gaimon View Post
    should've donated that money to kids in africa
    What a pathetic little creature you are. Coming into a thread specifically for people to confess things and trying to make them feel bad for it. Disgusting.
    Gonna give ya the D.!

  4. #2124

    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Let's not fight in the thread, that's not what it's for.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Gaimon View Post
    should've donated that money to kids in africa
    IDK if you meant it this way but don't be judgey.

  5. #2125
    Discovered Stowaway andre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by The D. View Post
    I bought a nearly three hundred dollar custom lightsaber and now I feel like shit because of it. I get paid in a week and had some extra money so I bought something I've wanted for a while. But I'm feeling incredibly guilty for spending so much money on something so stupid and frivolous.
    Do you have any plans with it? I have some friends (two brothers) who made 2 really cool lightsaber fight videos. Even if they didn't, having a custom one is really cool. I used to want one so badly.

  6. #2126
    Discovered Stowaway The D.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by andre View Post
    Do you have any plans with it? I have some friends (two brothers) who made 2 really cool lightsaber fight videos. Even if they didn't, having a custom one is really cool. I used to want one so badly.
    I don't, though it's apparently rated for full contact sparring. I wanted to build it with my dad, but that's not gonna happen. He's not dead or anything, just no longer in the picture. So I'm having it built and shipped just to have it I suppose. I'm very excited to have a custom built yellow lighsaber designed by me though. Star wars has been a special interest of mine since I was a kid.
    Gonna give ya the D.!

  7. #2127
    Discovered Stowaway andre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by The D. View Post
    I don't, though it's apparently rated for full contact sparring. I wanted to build it with my dad, but that's not gonna happen. He's not dead or anything, just no longer in the picture. So I'm having it built and shipped just to have it I suppose. I'm very excited to have a custom built yellow lighsaber designed by me though. Star wars has been a special interest of mine since I was a kid.
    Star Wars is for sure special to me as well. Something about the simplicity and sci-fi brilliance of the original films will always resonate with me.

  8. #2128
    Discovered Stowaway The D.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by andre View Post
    Star Wars is for sure special to me as well. Something about the simplicity and sci-fi brilliance of the original films will always resonate with me.
    Absolutely. The conflict between the jedi and sith is one of my favorite fictional dynamics.
    Gonna give ya the D.!

  9. #2129

    Default Re: Confession Session II

    My mother's nanny had a saying: "Better a taste than a buck in the pocket."
    I still want the Lego collectors version of the Millenium Falcon and the Death Star.


  10. #2130
    Discovered Stowaway andre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    I want to confess that I hate people who live in apartments and think it's ever appropriate to play loud music with bass. We had neighbors straight from the trailer park (literally) two doors down who played loud ass music constantly and would even park their truck and fix it while playing loud ass music from them. They were thankfully evicted. Unfortunately the people who moved in are drug dealers (literally) who play loud ass music all day and have shady and sketchy people coming in and out of their house all day. Ironically, the guy who lives there is the son of the people who lived there before the trailer park assholes, who also used to play super loud music. All of them are fuckwads and I wish them the worst in all things.
    Check out my podcast for conversations about Greatness in anime, sports, music, and whatever else we can think of.
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  11. #2131

    Default Re: Confession Session II

    My life is at a standstill for half a year and I don't really care.
    I feel like I could easily give up everything I've built up in my social life (well, most of them) and what I need to do to prioritize my career all at one go just to rewatch another anime or work on my art.
    Basically, I think I'm arrogant to believe I got the world figured out and what I need and don't really need. But I still haven't got enough character growth to be an apprentice sage.
    I used to care so much about relationships and finding love and you know, all the stuff.
    Yet when given the chance, I dont take the step further and although I enjoy the experience, ultimately I don't really care enough.

  12. #2132
    Here we are, Windy summer! Oddball's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by andre View Post
    I want to confess that I hate people who live in apartments and think it's ever appropriate to play loud music with bass. We had neighbors straight from the trailer park (literally) two doors down who played loud ass music constantly and would even park their truck and fix it while playing loud ass music from them. They were thankfully evicted. Unfortunately the people who moved in are drug dealers (literally) who play loud ass music all day and have shady and sketchy people coming in and out of their house all day. Ironically, the guy who lives there is the son of the people who lived there before the trailer park assholes, who also used to play super loud music. All of them are fuckwads and I wish them the worst in all things.
    My boyfriend and I plan on getting an apartment when we have a more stable income (hopefully soon). Having obnoxious and shady neighbors with no concern for others, is one of my biggest fears. The loud music apartment people you're describing sounds just like my bro except most of his friends are semi-decent people. Not to go into details, but I avoid my bro like the plague.

    Gross bedbug mention warning
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    Currently, my biggest fear of moving into an apartment is having neighbors with bedbug or flea problems. My sister's friend lived in an apartment complex with his dad. One of the neighbors had bedbugs that would creep into the walls, eventually getting into other people's rooms. His place where he and his dad lived had an infestation so bad that they had to throw out their furniture. Between bedbugs and fleas, bedbugs are worse from what I can tell.
    Please read my webtoon Truffle Cat Cafe

  13. #2133
    Discovered Stowaway andre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by Oddball View Post
    My boyfriend and I plan on getting an apartment when we have a more stable income (hopefully soon). Having obnoxious and shady neighbors with no concern for others, is one of my biggest fears. The loud music apartment people you're describing sounds just like my bro except most of his friends are semi-decent people. Not to go into details, but I avoid my bro like the plague.

    Gross bedbug mention warning
    Hidden:
    Currently, my biggest fear of moving into an apartment is having neighbors with bedbug or flea problems. My sister's friend lived in an apartment complex with his dad. One of the neighbors had bedbugs that would creep into the walls, eventually getting into other people's rooms. His place where he and his dad lived had an infestation so bad that they had to throw out their furniture. Between bedbugs and fleas, bedbugs are worse from what I can tell.
    Yeah. Having really unsanitary neighbors seems like a nightmare. We just had a family move out and I feel really bad for their kids. They would leave their toys outside and stuff, which was never a problem because kids will be kids, but they also tore up some objects that had belonged to some other residents and their parents never disciplined them. Well since Covid started maintenance hadn't been able to do checks and in that timeframe their house had become a pig sty. He said that one closet was caked with feces and everything was torn up. I hate to have to see kids raised by parents who don't teach them to be considerate of others or proper sanitation. It just seems wrong.
    Check out my podcast for conversations about Greatness in anime, sports, music, and whatever else we can think of.
    mtgoatmore.buzzsprout.com

  14. #2134
    Here we are, Windy summer! Oddball's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by andre View Post
    Yeah. Having really unsanitary neighbors seems like a nightmare. We just had a family move out and I feel really bad for their kids. They would leave their toys outside and stuff, which was never a problem because kids will be kids, but they also tore up some objects that had belonged to some other residents and their parents never disciplined them. Well since Covid started maintenance hadn't been able to do checks and in that timeframe their house had become a pig sty. He said that one closet was caked with feces and everything was torn up. I hate to have to see kids raised by parents who don't teach them to be considerate of others or proper sanitation. It just seems wrong.
    What's scary is that my bro and his gf have a one-year old living with them. The baby hardly has her teeth yet, and the mom is already feeding her solid food. Not even good solid food, like donuts. The poor baby's teeth are going to rot before her adult teeth start coming in. I hope my niece will grow up and not be anything like the parents raising her. I'm terrified for her future, tbh.
    Please read my webtoon Truffle Cat Cafe

  15. #2135
    Discovered Stowaway andre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by Oddball View Post
    What's scary is that my bro and his gf have a one-year old living with them. The baby hardly has her teeth yet, and the mom is already feeding her solid food. Not even good solid food, like donuts. The poor baby's teeth are going to rot before her adult teeth start coming in. I hope my niece will grow up and not be anything like the parents raising her. I'm terrified for her future, tbh.
    Yeah. I don't want to really tell any parent how to raise their children, but it's super frustrating when you're seeing obviously horrible stuff like that.
    Check out my podcast for conversations about Greatness in anime, sports, music, and whatever else we can think of.
    mtgoatmore.buzzsprout.com

  16. #2136
    Here we are, Windy summer! Oddball's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by andre View Post
    Yeah. I don't want to really tell any parent how to raise their children, but it's super frustrating when you're seeing obviously horrible stuff like that.
    Too true. I hope my niece will grow up to be a decent person. I also hope she stays in school and doesn't dropout like both of her parents did.
    Please read my webtoon Truffle Cat Cafe

  17. #2137
    The Moustache Bandit Nolus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    I've been having these rather unpleasant feelings quite more than usual as of late. Upon close examination, some ruminating and mediation, I've managed to boil them all down to one source. That is, a feeling of inadequacy, of inferiority. I'm pretty sure I'm suffering from impostor syndrome, although strangely enough, I haven't talked about it with my therapist, at least the name hasn't come up in our conversations. I'm much better at recognizing when these feeling crop up but I still haven't found a long term solution for dealing with them and it's rather frustrating. Especially when it concerns my friends.

    Spoiler:
    To give some concrete examples, most of my friends are currently at university studying programming and I feel sort of alienated, like I'm missing something, even though I have my own degree. A degree that I sometimes feel is mostly useless, since I'm not even using the knowledge for my work. Heck, I'm not even using the two languages I majored and minored in. I spent five and a half years getting this piece of paper and don't feel adequate enough to honestly call myself a BA graduate or a linguist. I don't even feel comfortable enough to say I speak Swedish or Finnish, because the only thing I can see is knowledge I lack not that I possess. I've been relearning Finnish this past half a year, and am honestly having a blast with it, but as soon as I'd have to prove my worth outside my own little room, I know I'd falter and chicken out.

    This feeling of my accomplishments being "easy" and "not at all noteworthy" haunts me in other parts of my life as well. I have a well-paying job where my colleagues and bosses appreciate me and have put to words that appreciation more than once throughout the years and I still think sometimes that what I'm doing is fairly easy and that's why I've been able to do it all this time.

    The stupidest of all is that even in games, I can't seem to get away from it. I've been playing Dark Souls a lot lately, the games that are notorious of its difficulty, the games that I thought I wouldn't be able beat, because I just wasn't good enough. I beat them alone, but hearing one of my friend claiming they're easy and that he's playing some ultra-difficult mod hurts a little. Even though my mind knows full well that it all matters none, because the games themselves have offered a lot more than difficulty, and that I shouldn't determine my worth based on such nonsense anyway.

    I could list countless more examples, some from my childhood, some from recently, but you get the idea.

    A year or so ago I purchased a little notebook, with the intention of writing down my bigger accomplishments, so that I can show myself that I'm worthy of praise once in a while. These accomplishments include my transition so far, getting my BA degree, successfully establishing and maintaining useful routines over the months and years and so on. I also list some of my biggest concerns about myself and by putting them into words, I'm able to distance myself from them and thing about them without the additional baggage of my not very accurate feelings.

    I know I'll probably feel better in a few days, when the weather front passes and I'm able to function normally again, but this is a recurring problem that I'm anxious to get rid of. I realize that I might never be "cured" of it, but I still want to get it to a more manageable level.


  18. #2138

    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by Nolus View Post
    Spoiler:
    To give some concrete examples, most of my friends are currently at university studying programming and I feel sort of alienated, like I'm missing something, even though I have my own degree. A degree that I sometimes feel is mostly useless, since I'm not even using the knowledge for my work. Heck, I'm not even using the two languages I majored and minored in. I spent five and a half years getting this piece of paper and don't feel adequate enough to honestly call myself a BA graduate or a linguist. I don't even feel comfortable enough to say I speak Swedish or Finnish, because the only thing I can see is knowledge I lack not that I possess. I've been relearning Finnish this past half a year, and am honestly having a blast with it, but as soon as I'd have to prove my worth outside my own little room, I know I'd falter and chicken out.
    Hidden:
    As someone with a degree in Japanese but currently working as a programmer, I know this feeling haha. It don't think any amount of college study will make you even close to fluent at a language, and while I love Japanese I'm not planning to move to Japan or anything. I'm also not really doing anything with my degree and didn't get where I currently am through it. But languages are awesome. You should feel proud about that. And you may think your job is easy, but if it were really the case you would not be getting paid well and lavished with praise. Gotta remind yourself of that. Meanwhile I am increasingly less passionate about my job and the money is great but ugh.

  19. #2139
    The Moustache Bandit Nolus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by Foolio View Post
    Hidden:
    As someone with a degree in Japanese but currently working as a programmer, I know this feeling haha. It don't think any amount of college study will make you even close to fluent at a language, and while I love Japanese I'm not planning to move to Japan or anything. I'm also not really doing anything with my degree and didn't get where I currently am through it. But languages are awesome. You should feel proud about that. And you may think your job is easy, but if it were really the case you would not be getting paid well and lavished with praise. Gotta remind yourself of that. Meanwhile I am increasingly less passionate about my job and the money is great but ugh.
    Spoiler:
    It seems few people manage to get jobs corresponding to their degrees. Wonder what the statistics are.

    I feel that part of my anxiety concerning languages comes from the fact that the worst of my depression was ravaging me when I started university and consequently Swedish. Interestingly enough this feeling is missing when it comes to Finnish or English. Or French. Probably because for all three, I was basically the top of my class, or part of the top anyway. Maybe that's why my initial failures with Swedish hurt especially bad.


  20. #2140
    Here we are, Windy summer! Oddball's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confession Session II

    Quote Originally Posted by Foolio View Post
    Hidden:
    As someone with a degree in Japanese but currently working as a programmer, I know this feeling haha. It don't think any amount of college study will make you even close to fluent at a language, and while I love Japanese I'm not planning to move to Japan or anything. I'm also not really doing anything with my degree and didn't get where I currently am through it. But languages are awesome. You should feel proud about that. And you may think your job is easy, but if it were really the case you would not be getting paid well and lavished with praise. Gotta remind yourself of that. Meanwhile I am increasingly less passionate about my job and the money is great but ugh.
    Hidden:

    Your situation is a bit similar to mine. I graduated from uni nearly 3 years ago and have been unemployed since. I took several years of Japanese, including a one-month study abroad program in Japan.

    This year and last, I applied for a teaching job in Japan, but got rejected both times. Now, I'm getting a little business going to become a self-employed artist. Basically, planning to be a self-proprietor, not an "official" business.

    Kind of feel like my bachelor of Asian Studies (Arts & Sciences) degree is worthless. I'm making more use of my associates in Art than my bachelors. Originally, I wanted to get a bachelors to work in Japan (because visa usually requires a bachelors to work there). Nobody told me how hard it is for a foreigner to get a job in Japan without having sufficient knowledge of the language. I'm thinking about doing independent research and writing academic essays comparing certain things in Japan and the US. Writing essays in college was a pain, but to me it's fun when it's about subjects I care deeply about. I'd also like to be a personal interpreter one day once I'm more fluent in Japanese.

    People say that you don't need to know Japanese to live in Japan, but I strongly disagree based on personal experience. You need to know what you're talking about in case of emergencies, like being lost, accidents, injuries, illness, etc. Contrary to popular belief, a lot of people in Japan actually don't know a lick of English, especially older folks. To me, it's foolish to just up and move to another country and not knowing the language, unless you have a solid support system there.
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